“The Lord is my shepherd;I have everything I need.” Psalm 23:1 NLT

October 19, 2021 – – It didn’t feel like I had everything I needed. I also didn’t know, as Doug and I climbed out of our truck at the Copper Queen Community Hospital in Bisbee, Arizona, that it would be the last time we walked together on this earth.

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Last week I began a new season of writing to mark the questions of my heart and major life changes over these last two years. I’m starting with the good and wonderful ways God has answered me.

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Doug and I were driving cross country to our home in Georgia. We had had a great time in Oregon visiting family and friends. On our way home we stopped in California to have dinner with my sister, nephew and his family. Then we headed to the only other stop Doug wanted to make, which was Tombstone, Arizona. He hadn’t been sleeping well and admitted to not feeling well. I suggested we just head straight home, but he insisted he’d be fine.

We stopped for dinner with friends of his near Scottsdale, Arizona. I’d only met the wife once and had never met her husband. Before arriving, I asked Doug again if this part of the trip was a mistake. He assured me he would be fine.

The next day and night in Tombstone were rugged. On the morning of the 19th, we needed to find medical help. The nearest emergency room was in Bisbee, Arizona. By then I felt frantic. Going to Bisbee took us even further away from our route home. Doug seemed to be slipping away. And no offense to Bisbee or its residents, but as we entered it, an old copper mining town, the gaping hole in the earth off to the right of the highway looked like we were descending into the pit of hell.

We made it to the hospital. Thankfully. Doug was driving but shouldn’t have been. We parked on the wrong side of the building and it proved to be a difficult walk for him.

We would not walk out together.

To be honest, I am leaving out a lot of detail. This is only a blog post. And, while there are many interesting details, they don’t add to my point here. As far as Doug’s health, he had suffered from a chronic medical condition for 25 years. For whatever reason, it had been triggered into an acute stage. We would learn more in coming days.

The ER doctor and nurse were wonderful to us. I was frightened, yet hopeful that they would do something to perk him up and we’d be on our way. When the blood tests came back that hope ended.

Doug needed to get to a major hospital immediately. His health was too fragile to even go by ambulance. He had to go by life flight. And I could not go with him.

I’m embarrassed to admit, but as worried as I was for Doug, I was also afraid for myself. I hated being in a place where I had absolutely no control. I was scared of driving Doug’s big, old diesel truck. He was the road warrior, not me. Doug was getting more agitated, protesting that we knew no one there and that he couldn’t leave me behind.

I couldn’t even think how to pray… so it was, “what do I do, God?… where are You?… Jesus, please help us”. For the next several days that is about the only prayer I could muster. My mind felt gray and blank and nothing made sense. But as I look back now, God was about to show me how He works through human lives to answer those gray, blank prayers of what, where and please help.

Eventually the ER doc returned with “some” good news. She had pressed for Doug to be taken to Tucson as he would be allowed visitors there on a limited basis. Covid protocols were still fairly strict and it was doubtful I’d be able to see him in person if he went to Phoenix. She got approval for Doug to be taken to Tucson, and we were so thankful. Oh, and the helicopter would be arriving in 20 minutes to pick him up.

There was a lot of conversation happening between Doug, the ER nurse and myself as she prepared him for transport. It would soon be dark and driving the truck was a monumental task I couldn’t begin to wrap my head around or where I would go. I don’t remember how we got there in the conversation, but our nurse had a friend who managed a nice hotel, would she like me to call her? Oh, yes, please! Within minutes I had a place to stay for the night. Not only that, she would drive me up there. It wasn’t far. Wow! A nurse taxi service! Doug and I were so relieved.

Doug gave me his wallet and keys. He got to keep his glasses and phone. We kissed goodbye and they wheeled his gurney out to the helicopter. I ran outside to our truck to grab a few things. As I finished, the helicopter rose from behind a rocky bluff next to the hospital. It flew right over me. I’ve experienced my share of desolate moments in life, but that one ranks close to the top.

The nurse drove me to the hotel. As I got out of her car she handed me a paper with her name and phone number on it. My instructions were to call her the next day if I needed any help. Yes, I think a nurse can be an angel.

The room was beautiful and peaceful. It even had it’s own coffee bar! And later that night I would find it also had the most comfortable bed I’d slept on in weeks. I felt horribly guilty that Doug wasn’t there to enjoy it.

After I’d fixed coffee and collected myself a bit, I checked my phone which I’d turned off earlier in the day. There was a sweet voice mail from my daughter-in-law, Michelle, and a rather perplexed one from my son, Ian. There were several text messages, including two from the couple we had had dinner with in Scottsdale days earlier. The husband offered to drive up the next morning. He would wrangle Doug’s truck and I could follow in his car. He’d get me to the medical center and if there was anything else he and his wife could do, we would figure it out later.

Apparently Doug had done what Doug does best… he put his phone to work even as he was being life flighted to a trauma center. He called and texted multiple people, letting them know he was on his way to the hospital and I was alone.

I talked to all four sons that night, assuring them I was ok and there was a plan in place. I began to relax a little, knowing Doug would get the care he needed and I’d be with him the next day. I was overwhelmed with thanks for the ER doctor, the ER nurse, for Doug and his phone, the hotel clerk who was so helpful, the messages on my phone and for the lovely couple from Scottsdale offering above and beyond help.

I was thankful to God who faithfully works through situations to bring the help that is needed, even when we, when I, briefly doubted he was even aware of our circumstance. And while I couldn’t see it at the time, I can say now as the psalmist did, “I have everything I need”. Doug and I both had what we needed for that day.

My son, David, called with plane ticket information. He would arrive in Tucson on the 21st. He planned to visit for a couple days, then drive our truck back to Georgia, assuming Doug would not be well enough to drive any time soon. I wasn’t so sure, at that moment, that he needed to do that. After all, it could be possible for Doug to snap out of whatever was going on in a day or two. Right?

It turned out that David’s plan was the wise one.