Did I Mess Up Already?

On By Brooke McGillivrayIn Writing

So my last post…. I share my big dream to the extent I know it.  I say something about “…be joyful, blah, blah…regardless of circumstance, blah, blah…write, blah, blah…be encouraging, blah, blah”……

This week… I don’t want to write a post AT ALL because I couldn’t stay joyful and I feel like a failure so why bother with any of it?

But see, that’s where I always go wrong.  Because this is a process.  And it’s a just begun process.  So why should I expect to have an end result?  And besides, I’m thinking that being joyful is kind of a day by day type of thing anyway.  Maybe.

So this week I’m supposed to write about the small step I took toward my big dream.

A small step indeed.  Two actually….

One step – I write in my journal every day.  Not alot… just enough.  When I write in my journal ideas jump out at me, sometimes even creative ones.  And sometimes when I read over what I wrote days before I see answers.  It’s better to write just a little than to sit and think about it.

Second step – that joy thing.

I’m great at 5 a.m. when the house is quiet.  I can read and pray and thank and worship.  Sometimes I get all the way to lunch before the bubble bursts.  Sometimes we make it to dinner… but rarely thru dinner.  And then there are days I walk down stairs to put the coffee on, and the circumstance I cannot control, cannot understand, cannot avoid… is waiting right there.  Right at the bottom of the stairs.

So I think this one Christmas snow globe is staying out for awhile.  Maybe all year.  It’s on the windowsill on the landing.  I see it a gazillion times a day when I run up and down.

My second small step… just to stop and read.  JOY.

A reminder.  A tap on the shoulder  Don’t forget….. JOY.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Dream-God-sized-Dreams-150x150

12 thoughts on “Did I Mess Up Already?”

  1. You are right about the writing. I, too, can sit and think and stew and fret, but when I put words on the paper, it looks different and new insights appear. A good thing. And joy. It is a choice, isn’t it, a choice bigger than our circumstances. Not easy, but to remember that it is a choice helps. Your words are not blah, blah, blah – you made me smile. I know the feeling, but it is worth putting them down, putting them out there.
    EnJOY your week!

    Like

    Reply

    1. There have been times I’ve thought of what I want to write, there is paper and pencil right at hand but I don’t write. And then I forget!! Trying not to do that anymore. And I’m very glad you don’t see blah, blah, blah when you read what I write 🙂 Thank you, friend!

      Like

      Reply
  2. Karen

    I agree it is more than a daily choice(the joy part), sometime a minute by minute choice. And oftentimes I forget it is even one of the choices…………..sigh
    Is this what it means to work out your salvation with fear and trembling? It does take a fair amount of work, and it doesn’t just fall into our proverbial lap.
    It is good to know we have fellow travelers crossing the same ruts, often getting stuck and then realizing we can go around it, the next time.
    Happy traveling, fellow Pilgrim. I always enjoy your comments and the decision that has been made to get to that point. Yeah, Brooke!

    Like

    Reply

  3. Your post makes me think of Ann Voskamp and Sara Frankl and their ‘Choose Joy’ mantra. (See http://bit.ly/qfe8cM and http://bit.ly/lyyreU ) Someone else said, “Choose joy, because happiness isn’t enough.”

    So no, you haven’t “messed up already”, because you’ve acknowledged the truth about joy… that it’s an ongoing choice. In my daily journalling I try to capture at least one everyday joy… a little thing that I might otherwise overlook or take for granted, like the feel of my favourite pottery mug as I cradle it in my hands, or the warm glow of lamplight and how it makes the room feel in the late evening. Things like that. It’s funny how the little things eventually accumulate, and stopping to notice them reminds me that joy is there. I just didn’t see it before.

    I think it’s a great idea to leave that snow globe out. When you stop and read ‘Joy’ it’ll be a good reminder to take time to look around and discover an existing joy that you can then savour.

    Like

    Reply

    1. Thanks for those links, Carol. Love them! I remember reading Sara’s, but somehow that one of Ann’s slipped by. I’m bookmarking it! I love your practice of writing about one everyday joy and examples. That is very doable. As always you are so encouraging. Thanks 🙂

      Like

      Reply

Leave a comment